vaganya

Last night in class we had a woman come and speak with us about her experience in the music industry and how we can establish ourselves in the right way.
I've been having doubts about school, and the thought of quitting has been in my mind for months now. I just can't justify spending the amount of money I am on a major that isn't needed. Most tour managers haven't gone to proper school for it, most didn't even know their was a major for it.
This woman however answered all my questions and more in a matter of three hours. Every doubt I have in my head is gone, and now I know exactly where I'm supposed to be.
I knew going into this I would be risking everything, and still after it all...It's worth the risk. At the end of everyday I always envision myself doing the same thing. I can't picture working a 9 to 5 job sitting at a desk on computers all day. I know that might be one of the shitty steps along the way and I can deal with that, but for my life? Not so much.
I know they'll be times when I feel like giving up, and hell, people will give up on me. I just need to hold my head high through it all. Push through.

I'm reminded every time I go to a show why this is all worth it. It's the only time that I can actually say I'm truly happy. I'm in my element surround by others who are in theirs. I leave every show with a different story or a different memory that will always be with me. It's that four hours of not having to care about anything happening in the real world. It's in all honesty a false reality. I'm that girl at the shows that won't be right up front the whole time, who enjoys the pushing a shoving until I'm too sweaty to want to be touched anymore. I move with my friends to the back and dance there. You'd be surprised how much fun you can have in the back. Don't get me wrong I'm always up for pushing and shoving...but in the end when you're concentrated on pushing the bitch next to you, aren't you losing focus of why you're all really there?
It's the sweat.
It's the breakdown.
It's the people around you.
It's the drummers spastic face when he's throwing his arms down.
It's the lead singer leaning out into the crowd to touch the hands of his fans so they feel more connected.
It's the guitarist and bassists kicks and spins.
It's when you just get done dancing your heart out, and then the band plays a slow song.
It's the shit they say to hold your attention.
It's the hidden harmony's you don't hear on the albums.
It's when you're so crammed into a space, the jumping of the entire crowd pulls you off your feet.
It's the smoke breaks in between sets(not in Chicago anymore)
It's the passion.
It's the energy.
It's being their with your friends, having a good time.
It's forgetting.
It's sitting in the car driving home after the show with a smile on your face.
It's waking up the next morning and your body aches. That's how you know it was a good show.

Understand yet?

Don't ruin this for me. Don't ruin my scene.